Tickled Pink

Engagement Journaling

    As any bride will tell you, your engagement and wedding will go by in the blink of an eye!  Looking back at my own 7 month engagement, there were so many decisions to be made and little obstacles to overcome that a lot of my planning just blends together.  Over time, I will forget about some of the choices we made for our wedding and some of the funny stories about that time in our lives.  I am not a diary-keeper but sometimes wish I were, as it is so easy to forget special moments and events.  Today I came across the easiest and possibly most fun to look back on way to journal: keeping a Record of the day.  This is a useful way to record and itemize ideas when planning any event, but could be done daily on index cards to record thoughts at the end of your day.  Here are some wedding-inspired cards.  Grab a set of 4x6 index cards and you're good to go!

Celeb Engagement News

    Another celebrity couple has announced their engagement--this time it's Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds, who have been dating a little under a year.  No wedding date has been set. 

Celeb Engagement

   

I don't do this a lot, but really--who doesn't like a little gossip? Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz have gone public with their engagement, saying that Pete popped the question on one knee with a big fat diamond ring.
    "We know there has been a lot of speculation recently about Pete and I and we wanted our fans to be the first to know, because you guys are the best. Yes, we are thrilled to share that we are happily engaged. Thank you for all of your support and well wishes - it means the world to us. We consider this to be a very private matter, but we wanted you to hear it straight from us. - Ashlee and Pete"
    I speculate that Ashlee's wedding dress will look nothing like her sister's lace sweetheart Vera Wang.  Ashlee's style seems a little more Gwen Stefani to me--remember the pink tulle?
    And if you have been under a rock this week, Beyonce and Jay-Z tied the knot at Jay-Z's NYC apartment on April 4 at 4:00pm (it's their lucky number), and on April 8 she finally confirmed the rumors by flashing her wedding ring rock around.  Weren't these two supposedly getting married for the past 2 years?  Well the deed is finally done.  Congrats newlyweds!

Questions for Your Venue

    

Choosing your wedding venue is often the first big step in the planning process.  Without a place in mind, it's hard to visualize what your big day will look like or even to come up with a guest list if you don't know how many you'll be able to hold.  Here are 13 questions to ask when touring potential venues--you'll need the answers to make your final decision on a place, and to not have any surprises along the way.

1.  Can you bring in your own vendors?
2.  What is the maximum number of guests the venue can hold? 
3.  Are there any timing issues?  Meaning, what is the earliest your florist and other vendors can start setting up?
4.  Is the site handicapped-accessible?
5.  How many bathrooms are there?
6.  Can the provide electricity for your band or DJ?  Remember to get the specific voltage they provide--your musicians will need to know.  Also, check to see what the price is for using the venue's electricity.
7.  Will there be any renovations or landscaping around the time of the wedding?  If there are flowers planted at your ceremony site, will they be the same color at your wedding? 
8.  How many other weddings may take place on my wedding day?
9.  What do the basic linens, tables, chairs, and china look like, and what are my upgrade options?
10.  How is alcohol priced, and am I allowed to bring my own in to serve?
11.  What is the overtime policy? 
12.  Are there any additional charges I should know about?  Valet, cake cutting fees, etc...
13.  What are the sound ordinances?  For instance, in Orlando, FL, outdoor receptions must end at 10pm because of city sound ordinances.

Tips for Savvy Brides Becoming Step-Moms III

This is Part Three in our guest post “Oh Yeah, You Blend!” – Tips for the Savvy Bride Who Wants to Make her New Title as “Step Mom” Rather Becoming

I was fortunate, as my stepdaughters, ages 10 and 12 at the time, were very excited about their dad’s wedding. During their visits, he made them such the center of his universe that they imagined him eating dinner alone at home watching re-runs on TV during their absence (little did they know about the life of an executive on the fast track in New York!). When I thanked them for being excited about the wedding, they told me that they were glad that their dad wouldn’t be lonely any more when they were away. It was great – but there are times when children are less than excited about the remarriage of their parent. For these children, here are some ideas to consider:

• Perhaps they feel they are losing a parent to this marriage. Please, encourage your fiancé to devote one on one time with the children during the engagement.  Never act threatened by his attention to them, and perhaps they won’t act threatened by his attention to you. In marriage, one’s spouse should always come first, but remember – they were there first!
• If they don’t want to be the center of attention during or even included in the ceremony, there may be a way they can contribute that is more in their comfort zone. They may be able to play a musical instrument during the procession. If they are artistic, perhaps they can design a cover for the program.  A crafty child may enjoy putting together and or designing the wedding      favors. Tap into their place of confidence, and it may increase their confidence in you!
• Most of all let them be and accept who they are. Look for the best in their lives and help them to magnify those things. Seek out what you may have in common, and slowly build their      trust. Once they know you’re not out to change them and that you have a genuine interest in their life, they may reciprocate by showing an interest in yours. They have been through an awful lot – honor who they are. You can learn a lot from their strength.

 
When I got engaged, I was so clouded by all that was going on that I never once thought about what it would be like to be a step mom fifteen years later. I can say with confidence that as fun as it was back then, each year gets better and better. I love being a step mom and it is a title I wear with both enthusiasm and humility. Step moms have gotten a bad wrap – not just by Disney! If you can free yourself from all the stereotypes and follow Dr. Brothers’ advice to be “…one more person crazy about that child,” in fifteen years I hope you feel like me: you can call me a lot of things, but you are only paying me the highest compliment by calling me “step mom.”

© Dana Fletcher, dba “The Third Mrs. Fletcher” Publications
March, 2008
Please, contact Dana to copy or reproduce any portion of this article via e-mail at dfletcher.ace@comcast.net

Tips for Savvy Brides Becoming Step-Moms II

This is Part Two of our guest post “Oh Yeah, You Blend!” – Tips for the Savvy Bride Who Wants to Make her New Title as “Step Mom” Rather Becoming

    One of my goals when I got married was for my stepdaughters to feel as important and as comfortable as possible at the wedding. I wanted it to be so fun for them, and something they anticipated with great excitement. Here are some of the ideas I incorporated to let my new girls know how important they are to me.

• Include the children in the wedding party – better yet, make the children the entire wedding party. Frank, my fiancé, didn’t really know who he wanted as a best man, and I didn’t want the girls to get lost in a sea of bridesmaids, so we made the girls our entire wedding party. Yep, just us! It is so great to look back at those wedding pictures and see just the four of us – all three of us girls in white and Frank looking so handsome in his tux. It seems very simple – and it was – but it said a lot about our new family.
• Have the wedding in a place where the children are comfortable.  At the time we became engaged, Frank and I lived in Connecticut, my family still lived in my hometown of San Diego, and the girls lived in Florida. The more we thought about it, we decided to have a destination wedding in Florida to make it easier on the girls. There are a lot of great places to have weddings in central Florida, but we chose a casual beach-front hotel where Frank and the girls had spent a lot of great times together as a family.  We wanted our wedding to be an extension of those happy times.
• Consider the children when creating the guest list. This was a challenge for me. I come from a very large family and the four siblings that married before me and the one that married after me all had guest lists in the hundreds. As I pondered this, I really felt best for my new family to keep it small and intimate. That way, we could enjoy the girls, and they would not get lost in the crowd. We also invited friends and family whom the girls had known for all or most of their lives. It was fun for them and a great opportunity for me to get more acquainted with these important people, as well.
• Consider the children when creating the menu.  Although chicken tenders may not be at the top of your list – it may be a big hit with the kids, and goes better with caviar than I ever expected! Consider some favorite foods and special treats for the children when meeting with the caterer.
• Be open to the children’s ideas. My stepdaughters had really pretty white dresses that they wore during the ceremony, but they felt they would want to get more comfortable later. When they came up with the idea of getting comfy – but very darling – rompers to change into, I told them to go for it! They stayed in their white dresses for much of the reception, but they were eventually ready to change into their rompers to be more comfortable greeting all of “their guests” and for be-bopping back and forth from the beach.
• Make proper arrangements for the children. We made arrangements for the children’s transportation to and from the wedding far in advance. They shared a hotel room with my two nieces from Atlanta so they could get to know one another and have a fun “slumber party” like atmosphere the night before the wedding. There wasn’t any last minute rushing about to create chaos and uncertainty. Fortunately, some wonderful grandparents stepped in to really help us out (thanks BWS and LV!).

These were all ideas that suited my situation. You will come up with even better ones that “blend” with your own personal style. I have also observed many other wonderful ideas throughout the years.

• One bride had her 6 year-old son walk her down the aisle.
• I saw one ceremony where the vows were extended to include loving and cherishing the children brought into the marriage. The children were called up immediately after, and placed their hands upon their parents’ hands while the minister pronounced a blessing upon the family.
• I have seen the children included in the lighting of the unity candle.
• Children can get involved in other ways by handing out programs, taking pictures with their own disposable cameras, making and/or handing out wedding favors, distributing bubbles or birdseed for the “big exit” of the bride and groom, etc.
• This necklace is called a family medallion necklace. It was designed as a special gift that can be presented to the children as a gift before, after, or even during the ceremony. The three intertwined circles represent the joining of families to create an all inclusive new family. It is a really beautiful idea.

 For children who are excited and interested, the opportunities are endless, and, with some care, they can contribute their own personal flare without cramping your sense of style.

Check back tomorrow for Part Three of our guest post on marrying into a "blended" family.

Tips for Savvy Brides Becoming Step-Moms I

This is the first of three guest posts by my step-mom, Dana.  Check back through Friday to read about her journey in committing to a blended family, taking on step-daughters, and tips to help you ease into your own blended family.

“Oh Yeah, You Blend!” – Tips for the Savvy Bride Who Wants to Make her New Title as “Step Mom” Rather Becoming

By Dana Fletcher-- Someone who thinks being a Step Mom is great!

    “Oh yeah, you blend!” Who can forget this fabulous line from the movie My Cousin Vinny. During the set up, Vinny (Danny DeVito) is discussing the necessity for Mona Lisa (Marisa Tomei) to tone down her tough New Yorker exterior to “blend in” with the small Southern town where they are currently staying/working. He expresses that due to the fact he is wearing cowboy boots, he is exhibiting efforts that are superior to hers. That is when she lets him have it! If you are among 25% of all new brides who are also becoming step moms, creating a balanced “blend” in your new family will require far more than donning cowboy boots (and there are times when that is absolutely NOT recommended)! There is no better place to start setting the tone for your new family than in the thoughtful planning of your wedding.

When I was a girl, dreaming of my fairytale wedding, somehow I never included in those dreams the idea of becoming a step mom. Sometimes when we least expect it, our dreams are upgraded into even brighter realities. In retrospect, my life would have never been as complete without my stepdaughters. It has been a wonderful adventure being a step mom – many lessons to learn – more rewards than lessons. 

As you ponder your wedding, consider this pearl of wisdom. About a week after I became engaged, I happened to catch an interview on TV with famed psychologist Dr. Joyce Brothers. She was addressing the topic of blended families. When asked what the primary role of the step parent is, she responded, “To be one more person that is absolutely crazy about that child.” I will never forget that. When I have made that my priority, my life has been at its best.

Check back tomorrow for Part Two of Dana's guest post about blending families and becoming a step-mom.

Planning your wedding with the Just Marry! DVD

    I work with brides everyday and realize that not everyone wants/needs to hire a wedding planner.  Wedding planner Susan Sutherland, owner of Just Marry!, knows it too and has made herself available to DIY brides through her DVD, Wedding Planning Secrets.  I met Susan through my work in Orlando and feel confident that her expertise helps brides-to-be by preparing them for the planning adventure and equipping them with the knowledge needed to do it right.  Susan has been in the business for 20 years and has seen the complete evolution of weddings for brides in the U.S. and around the world.  Her DVD is helpful for those beginning their wedding planning, for aspiring planners, and even for mothers or friends that want to be helpful to a bride.  Visit the link above for the Wedding Planning Secrets trailer and for more information.

20 Cheap Date Ideas

As the weekend approaches, many of us are looking for something to do.  Whether you're spending less as you plan for your future or just tired of the same old neighborhood places, here are 20 fun and inexpensive date ideas to keep you busy.

1.  Pick up wine, cheese, and a blanket or lawn chairs and watch the sunset
2.  Go to a free festival or farmer's market
3.  Take a bike ride and stop for a picnic
4.  Get a group together for a night of board games or charades
5.  Plan a day trip to a nearby city you've never visited
6.  Rent a canoe or kayaks and explore the waterways
7.  Go fishing
8.  Host a field day with volleyball, badminton, croquet...ask everyone to bring food or drinks
9.  Take a ballroom dancing or salsa class
10. Walk, bike, or skate your local trails
11. Challenge yourself at an indoor rock climbing gym
12. Visit a museum
13. Catch a movie in the park or a drive-in show.  Bring your own popcorn
14. Paint portraits of each other
15. Play miniature golf
16. If you have snow, go sledding or snow tubing
17. If you have warm weather, spend a day at the beach
18. Take your dogs to a dog park
19. Do a walking tour of your city.  Share memories of your life there as you go
20. Cook dinner together and have a movie marathon

If you're engaged or married, continue weekly dates throughout your marriage.  According to Scott Stanley, Ph.D, about 40% of young couples marrying today will divorce unless we do something in society to change that.  Don't grow apart as a couple.  Make time for each other and continue "dating" long after your vows are said.  Continuing to date your mate allows you to try new things and grow together as you share experiences. 

I'd love to hear about unique and/or inexpensive dates you've gone on.  Send in your favorites and I'll post them on Tickled Pink.

A sweet post from E-Events

From my work at Solutions Bridal, I have become great friends with a FANTASTIC wedding and event planner, Lisa Konecny of E-Events.  Lisa blogs, too, and today she wrote a cute post about Sam and I and our upcoming wedding (this Saturday!!).  Here's what Lisa had to say.  Check out her In My Shoes blog, for fresh and out-of-the-box wedding ideas.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Brittany and Sam:  Beauty and the...Injured???

I am feverishly looking forward to this Saturday's wedding of Brittany and Sam...

Brittany and I have actually known and worked together for several years now as she has been my main go-to gal at (we all know it's my favorite!) Solutions Bridal.

The roles have been reversed for this true beauty and it's her turn to don the (Romona Keveza) white dress and to be fussed over.  (P.S.:  I called that she would be wearing a Romona years ago!!)

I do need to brag a bit about Brittany for a moment, however! She is indeed a true beauty; inside and out. I have never known her to be anything but "sunshine," poised, or to ever turn down a challenge. (Trust me, I feel I alone have put her through enough of those!)

This day is so well-deserved for Brittany and Sam. I know little, but enough of Sam to understand his true love for Brittany and the respect he has for his and her family. Now...for the injured part-- Sam was beginning to enjoy the beginning of his bachelor week in Costa Rica when a random accident in the water caused him to snap his collarbone immediately. Poor Sam! He is braving through this latest roadblock though! Pure joy should carry them through on Saturday-

What about these incredible images from their engagement session from the renown Garrett Nudd?!?  I hope to look that cute on my BEST day!  :)

Garrett and Joy:  What easy subjects!  I can't wait to see your magic with their wedding images!

Being a part of Brittany and Sam's wedding planning has been an affecting experience that I have the highest anticipation for the actual big day and even higher expectations for their marriage--

Posted by Lisa Konecny-E Events Design on Wednesday, February 06, 2008