Tickled Pink Brides - Orlando, Florida's Premier Wedding Planner

Renewing Your Vows

Why have a vow renewal?  In my opinion, there are two schools of thought.  On one hand, vow renewals are perfect for married couples who want the party all over again.  How many people look back at their weddings and would have done things differently the second time around, or loved every minute of their wedding day and want to recreate that feeling?  On the other hand some couples, whether married one year or fifty years, want to restate original vows or promise new vows that are relevant to their marriage in its current state.  The New York Times recently featured an article on vow renewals that gave insight to why the trend may be increasingly popular.  In modern times, people live longer than they used to, meaning more years for couples to stick together, work things out, and "renegotiate" over the course of their marriage.  Women no longer depend as much as they used to on their husbands, and come into marriage with a notion that they are equals.  We expect relationships and marriage to be fair and have higher expectations.  In current times, when women no longer have to make things work and divorce is common, couples who stay together bargain, sacrifice, and change together in a way that was years ago unheard of.  

So who is renewing their vows?  Celebrities like Heidi Klum and Seal host themed vow renewals once a year.  So do Mariah Carey and husband Nick Cannon, who have only been married for two years and have already had two renewal ceremonies.  

Want to have your big day (or a more intimate gathering) all over again?  Give us a call or send an email and allow us to plan your re-nuptuals!  

Hiring Wedding Vendors: Officiants

    Your ceremony officiant is the person who will legitimize your marriage and make it recognizable to both church and state.  This is a very important piece of your wedding planning, and having the right person officiate will make your day that much more special.  If you are not getting married in a church, consider a friend or family member that might be able to officiate.  Wedding officiants must be notaries and can even become ordained online.  A person who knows you and your fiance is going to word your wedding ceremony much more personally than one who has no knowledge of your relationship.  For this reason, having multiple meetings and pre-wedding counseling with your officiant can make his/her task in writing the ceremony easier and more meaningful.

Questions for the officiant:

• How much will the ceremony outline be personalized to our relationship?
• What type of planning meetings or counseling is required before you will marry us?
• Do we have a choice in saying traditional vows or writing our own?
• How long do you anticipate the ceremony lasting? (Also consider added songs, readings, unity ceremonies, etc)
• When would you like for us to give you the marriage license?
• Will you be mailing in our completed marriage license or do we need to do that?
• (Destination weddings) Is your ordination valid in the place we are getting married?
• Do you plan to attend the rehearsal?

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi Wedding Video

    This week Ellen showed a video of her wedding to Portia de Rossi on her talk show.  This is the video she featured, showing the couple preparing for the wedding together at their home, then celebrating with their closest friends and family.  Ellen's reaction to seeing Portia for the first time in her wedding gown is priceless.  Still shots of the evening are also included--their photographer did an amazing job!  All over the internet I see "grab a tissue before watching!".  They are completely right.  It is really that sweet.  And if you love the song being played as much as me, I'll make it easy for you.  It's called "Today", by Joshua Radin, and it's available on iTunes.

White Gowns, Wedding Bands, and Wearing Veils--Oh, Why?

    Whether or not you choose to incorporate the many traditional elements we've come to expect at weddings, we've all seen the traditions upheld time and again.  Have you ever stopped to think about where those traditions come from and why they are still used today?  Here's a little history of the classic wedding rites. 

Why wear a veil? 
According to tradition, it's bad luck for a bride and groom to see each other before the ceremony.  Only more recently did the sheer tulle or net veil come into play.  Veils were made from thicker fabric that was harder to see through, and typically fell from the head all the way to the feet.  Centuries ago, courtship was basically unheard of, and many marriages were arranged by the families.  The veil allowed the bride to stay covered until revealed at the wedding by her groom, who lifted it from her face.

Why carry something blue?
The color blue is a symbol of love, loyalty, and fidelity.  In biblical artwork, it is the color worn by the Virgin Mary.

Why throw rice?
Most couples have forgone the tradition of throwing rice at the ceremony's conclusion.  Sparklers, bubbles and butterflies, however, don't carry the same meaning as rice did.  A customary Oriental tradition, the tossing of rice was a wish that the couple's pantry always be full.  It symbolizes a lack of want/need and a prosperous life together.

Why does the bride carry a bouquet of flowers?
Brides first carried herbs and spices down the aisle to ward off evil spirits.  Flowers have always had meaning--daisies for innocence, ivy for fidelity, red roses for love, and so on.  Traditionally, brides carried flowers with meanings dear to her heart.  Today, we choose wedding flowers based on color and style, though the traditional meanings are still often kept in giving flowers for bereavement, friendship, or as congratulations.

Why have a bridal party?
A bride's maids were traditionally the ones who helped her prepare the wedding feast (imagine cooking for your own wedding!).  The maid of honor was the one who spent the days leading up to the wedding with the bride, made the wreath for her head, and helped her dress.  As old superstitions said that evil spirits or jealous suitors could harm the newlyweds, bridesmaids and groomsmen dressed almost identical to the bride and groom, making it hard to identify which was the couple getting married.

Old, new, borrowed and blue?
A family heirloom connects the bride to her past.  Something new symbolizes good luck and prosperity for the future.  Something borrowed from a friend or family member reminds the bride that those people are always there for her.  The blue stands for love and loyalty, and is often kept close to the bride in the form of a garter, handkerchief, or patch sewn into the gown near her heart.

Marriage: 10 Tips to Live By

As a current or former bride-to-be, you understand the whirlwind of excitement and activity that goes into planning a wedding.  Your courtship has been full of love and now you're planning for the beginning of your new life together.   It's an exciting time and it always seems to go by too fast.  When the vows are said, however, the real deal starts.  Just as you have overcome any hurdles while dating, the same will need to be done during the marriage, over and over again, to make it last.  You'll have to work side-by-side to make big decisions.  How will you manage finances?  Raise your children?  Which city will you live in?  Will you practice religion? 

Seemingly small choices can make a big impact, too.  How will you spend your weekends?  How often will you see your friends?  Whose job is it to do laundry and dishes?  Because of growth through decisions big and small, many couples lose sight of the core of their marriage and grow apart even during the first few years. 

You've heard that marriage is hard work.  Have you ever really thought about that?  When two people marry, those are two very different individuals with different upbringings, varied lifestyles, and different points-of-view committing to love and support each other eternally.  Of course it will be hard!  A recent blog post covered 10 tips for making a marriage last.  Consider the following and how it applies to your own relationship, before and during your marriage:

1.  Have a vision for your marriage and your family and discuss that with your partner.  This means that you can picture what kind of home life you would like to have; what kind of atmosphere you would like to live in.  Welcome change even when it is the least expected.  Take that as an opportunity to grow together.

2.  Focus on what you can do to enhance or improve the relationship, not on demanding what your spouse needs to do differently.

3.  Overlook imperfection in your spouse if it is not a matter of life or death, physical abuse or substance abuse, immoral or illegal.

4. Learn to communicate healthily and effectively. Avoid being argumentative. Your home is not a courtroom. No one needs to win. You are to work things out as a team.

5.  Compliment your spouse sincerely to build him/her up: Appreciate your spouse the way he/she is.

6.  Show respect to your spouse in front of others - your children, in-laws, friends and strangers; Show respect to your spouse even when no one is watching;  Be on the same page with your spouse in disciplining your children.

7.  Provide timely support to your spouse.  Carve out time to be together intimately.  Make time for each other as husband and wife. Do not take your spouse for granted.

8.  Forgive and move on.  Don’t hold grudges.

9.  Come together to understand each other's form of spirituality.

10.  Bless each other on a daily basis.  Lift your spouse up and remember that he/she is so special that you chose to spend your life with them.

Wedding Time Capsule

    This may look like the lazy-blogger's post, but the idea is just so good I wanted to share.  Polka Dot Bride posted an idea for a wedding time capsule to preserve memories of your big day for years to come.  Using a few beautiful boxes, store special things like menus, invitations, guest book, party favors, the garter, etc.  In the years to come, you and your spouse, along with your children and grandchildren, will have such fun looking back in time and reliving your wedding.  Here's the post from Polka Dot Bride:

A fun idea after the wedding is to create a wedding time capsule of sorts. Possibly not something to dig a hole in your backyard for, but using a nice box, a place to hold some special tokens.

Plympton White Leather Boxes from Whiteport

Your wedding ‘time capsule’ could include

• A letter to each other for the future
• Wedding invitation
• Wedding accessories such as napkins, wedding favours and programs
• A menu listing your reception meal
• Newspaper/Entertainment/Sport magazine/television from your wedding day
• Your wedding guest list
• Cork from your champagne toast
• Honeymoon brochures
• Ticket stubs
• Predications and well wishes from wedding guests.

It may be the perfect thing to open on your 10th wedding anniversary with a bottle of Cristal and some pretty good cake in hand (I suggest a brand new cake for this part of course!)

Modern Ring Bearer Pillows

    In our wedding, we didn't have a ring bearer, because a) we didn't know any boys little enough for the job, and b) I've seen too many cheesy ring bearer pillows.  Turns out I didn't look hard enough.  If I could have a re-do, I might have had the flower girl carry the rings down on one of these adorable "pillows" (more like ring displays).  My sister served as our flower girl and carried down a small, moss-covered basket filled with petals.  To fit the theme, I suppose she could have carried this instead:

A little bird's nest holding two rings would definitely have fit the bill.  Here are other ring bearer "pillows" I found on Etsy--it seems you really can find a fitting display to get those rings down the aisle in style.

Cultural Wedding Ceremony Traditions

    There are more cultural and religious ceremonies for weddings to possibly list, many that date back thousands of years.  Most of the customs symbolize the union of the new couple and their families intertwining.  As an added twist to a typical wedding, consider incorporating a cultural ceremony that dates back to your ancestors, or simply choose one that interests you.  Here are some of my favorites and the meaning behind them:

Parents down the aisle (Judaism): Both the bride and groom's parents escort the couple down the aisle to symbolize the union of the two families.  This is also a way to incorporate children, should either the bride or groom already have any.

Yichud (Judaism): This is a short period immediately following the ceremony for the bride and groom to be alone.  Today, it's a quiet time to reflect on the big event that just occurred, or to grab a bite to eat before you face the masses!  This is perfect for any couple, regardless of their faith.

Handfasting (Celtic):  In a handfasting ceremony, the couple's hands are crossed and bound together by rope or a cord which is tied in a knot.  This is a possible origin for the phrase "tying the knot", and represents an unbreakable union between man and wife.  While this tradition has pagan origins, it is used today in Christian and non-denominational ceremonies, too.

Wrapping the Couple (Spanish): The parents of the couple (or just the mothers) come to the alter and wrap the bride and groom in a long veil (traditionally a mantilla) or fabric, symbolizing union of the couple and their families.  The couple may stand this way for a few seconds, maybe as part of the ceremony is read.  The mothers then unwrap and fold the veil.

Honey Ceremony: The bride and groom feed each other a small spoonful of honey as a symbol of the sweet life they will now share. 

Sapta Padi (Hinduism): The couple walks seven steps together as a symbol of their friendship.  In Hinduism, friendship is the basis of a marriage's foundation.

Monique and John's Vegas Wedding

    Last week Sam and I visited Las Vegas to attend the wedding of our friends Monique and John.  Having never been to Vegas herself, Monique was able to plan a beautiful ceremony and reception at the Emerald at Queensridge.  The venue was set between a mountain landscape just before sunset.  Monique wore an absolutely stunning Rivini gown from Solutions Bridal.  It was such a sweet ceremony (and of course I forgot tissues!).  About 45 family members and friends flew to Vegas for the wedding.  Guests came from across the country, and from as far as France and England to be there.  I looked around at the reception and saw everyone on their feet dancing and celebrating--there was so much love in that room!  Congrats, Monique and John!

7 Steps for a Successful Marriage

What steps can you take during your engagement to better ensure a happy marriage?  Our good friend at MarcandAngel.com defined 7 precise steps in his post 7 "Before the Wedding" Steps that Initiate a Successful Marriage.  He emphasizes honesty and openness to each other on topics like finances, children, and life goals.  The objective is to "reveal any hidden inconsistencies in your relationship that might draw a negative effect on your marriage".  Some tips seem obvious, but as you read, really consider whether you and your significant other have discussed these topics in depth.  If not, it's time.  If so, you're probably on the right path!